Take a Poo

Lake Takapō – vast, mountain-lined, and clean. A town so very reflective of its country.

Takapō’s giggle-inducing name, like its peripheral-testing landscapes, will live long in the memory. Too few were the days spent in this terrific void; it is a place that most tourists pass through to get to where they’re going, stopping a night and wishing for more to do. But to be completely present in Tekapo takes a different understanding of time and direction. Why the need for rush? Why the urgency for completion? Why is that Sea Lion getting closer to us? Oh, Christ he’s coming for me - QUICK, TAKE THE CAMERA!

A Māori approach to life is needed throughout most of New Zealand - an attitude of being okay with not knowing where or what the future is. By looking at what we know and what we see, instead of galloping so eagerly into what we believe our destination should be, we can appreciate not only ourselves better, but our surroundings too.

Ka mura, Ka muri…. Life goes on, bro. La-la how the life goes on.

The Aoraki Mackenzie International Dark Sky Reserve sounds a lot like somewhere that would be fenced off miles before its epicentre. A place guarded by choking whiffs and discarded Hazmat suits, shrouded in secrecy and accessible only through military clearance or by running a Substack out of your nan’s spare room. The truth is far more inspiring and soul-enriching than any rumoured government research centre. It is the largest dark sky reserve in the Southern Hemisphere, which means it’s the best place to stargaze below the equator. I happen to believe that even above the invisible divider of our planet, you’d not find such a far-reaching and transparent sky in which to view the grandeur of Space. It’s enough to leave you truly breathless, without the need for dramatic cliché. The band of the Milky Way laid out above you in all its glittering glory is a sight to beat all others. The stars dance to the tune of absolute silence, winking at their spectators whilst the International Space Station circulates like a baby’s mobile. No light. No camera. No recording equipment. Just the faint memory of a sky alive with the burning past of intergalactic neverlands.

What a place to behold.

“Water sucks. Gatorade is better.”

Joseph Cobb

Joseph Cobb was born at Chase Farm hospital, Enfield, just before the turn of the millennium. It is rumoured that when Mrs. Cobb gave the final push, the drab winter clouds parted and the miserable faces of North London basked in an unseasonably warm flash of sunlight.

The child was due on Christmas Day, though was far too indolent to keep to schedule. He bears the holy initials JC, and his older brother, Billy (BC), came before him…naturally. He believes himself to be a messiah: the second coming, but by his own admission, far more humble than his predecessor.

Previous
Previous

Reconstruction

Next
Next

Southern Comfort